Once Upon a Time...

I believed in fairy tales. I used to envision being swept off my feet, just like when Mayo scoops up Paula in An Officer and a Gentleman. I would be wearing a sweeping silk gown (I rejected the 'factory setting' from the movie). My hair would be flowing down my back, and my dainty feet would be kicked up in the air when my personal Knight in Shining Armor carried me away in a fit of passion which he could just no longer deny.

And then...then I realized that that movie was actually released two years before I was even born.  I realized that by now the stress of military life would probably have caused their marriage to self-destruct, leaving Mayo a cold and hardened military machine with no show of outward emotion, and Paula a bitter and cynical middle aged divorcee with 2 kids and a dog who bashes men at her book club each week.

Reality is harsh. And unfair. That's not to say there aren't Mayo's and Paula's out there who make it, and even happily so. I'm just saying that real life is gritty and not necessarily filled with officers waiting to carry you away from your day job (unless you've committed a heinous crime). In real life, my feet are not dainty, and are in badly need of a pedicure. In real life, it would take a very strong man to pick me up and carry me away, because I like food a lot, and my body shows it. That's real life. Fairy tales, while providing feel-good fun and warm fuzziness, are just that; tales. They're stories, lore, myth even.

I certainly believe in soul mates, and love that lasts for a lifetime, and happy endings. But, moreover, I believe in love as a choice...not just a feeling. It's waking up, every day, and choosing to love your partner over any other person. It's recognizing, honoring, and maintaining that commitment. And it's hard as heck some days!!! Because no one is perfect and no one has it all together, all the time. But loving through the sour, to me, makes the bond that much sweeter.

I still believe in 'fairy tales'. I believe that people, who come from nothing, can achieve anything. I believe that the country we live in and the freedom we enjoy is absolutely a fairy tale. The resilience we show as a human race in the face of suffering IS a fairy tale! But when it comes to it, I prefer to live my story...and while it's no fairy tale, it is an overwhelmingly blessed life to live.